Slowly, very, very slowly, I become aware that I’m floating.

I can’t see anything except total blackness all around me …………. cool, inviting blackness.

My memory is quite foggy; every thought seems sluggish and slow, almost as though I’ve been drugged.

I don’t recall how or why I’m here…………….… nor do I really know where here is, but it is so peaceful that I just don’t care.

I can’t really see anything, only blackness.

My entire being is so relaxed and calm that nothing really concerns me at the moment.

As I float here, completely weightless and free, my mind gently nudges me as though I’ve forgotten something…………..…..but at the moment it’s a very minor concern and I ignore it as I float peacefully.

There is no one else here with me and I don’t really notice anything around me, no walls, no colors, only the cool, quiet, blackness of nothing.

I’m not worried at all, it’s almost as though I belong here.

Once again I feel as if I’ve forgotten something………….it nibbles ever so slightly at the back of my mind………………….but it’s so easy to push away while I float softly.

I have no concept of time, I don’t know how long I’ve been here, and it is so very quiet and peaceful, I feel as though I could remain like this forever.

And then suddenly………………………………………. I am falling

And it is sheer terror…………………...

With a start, I snap my head up quickly, and open my eyes wide, quite certain that I will be crashing to my death at any moment.

My mind races and my eyes dart back and forth, drinking in the scene around me, “Wait ...........I’m not falling!” my mind shouts, “I’m not falling!”

Faster than words can describe, I remember where I am and what I am supposed to be doing.

My mind is still racing as I look around sheepishly, hoping I have not just made a complete fool of myself.

Everything looks fine; no one seems to be paying any attention to me at all, no pointing fingers, no laughing.

“Whew”, I think, and take a measured deep breath, trying to clear my head and focus.

I glance at the young elf woman sitting to my right; she is looking at me with a slight smile, a mixture of amusement and surprise on her face. Her light blue eyes dance with wonderment as the locks of her golden blonde hair fall mischievously around her lovely face.

I return her smile and look away.

She reminds me very much of Petricia.

An image of Petricia forms instantly in my mind.

She is dancing slowly, moving her glorious body gently to the right and then the left. Her hand is raised and she is beckoning me towards her. Her long, golden hair is pulled up, exposing her lovely, slender neck and her thin lips are slightly parted and colored with just a hint of red. They look moist and very inviting and I just want to ….

“Stop it!” my mind shouts.

The image vanishes.

Slowly, I refocus on the lectern where brother Meek is speaking.

“……. and so, we can see that the mission of the Lay Ministry is indeed a twofold Ministry, encompassing both the……...”

His tone is calm and relaxing, his voice is low and level, his words are slow and deliberate.

For a brief moment I wonder if this is some kind of test, a clever exam to see if anyone, anyone at all can stay awake.

A slight grin creeps onto my face.

I force myself to pay attention.

Brother Meek drones on, “……while considering the fact that one must remain outside of the cold realities of the world in which we live, there must also be some connection to it, a dual connection, one that allows us to ……”

My mind wanders.

I look around at some of the others who are closest to me. They don’t seem to be having any trouble staying awake or following along with the lecture.

I just can’t seem to focus or concentrate.

It’s not that I don’t want to be here, I really do. Normally I find this kind of information to be fascinating; It’s just that this particular speaker is ………well, for lack of a better term, boring.

My eyelids grow heavy and slowly start to close; I allow it, thinking I will only close them for a moment.

Suddenly, the world explodes with color, warm golden sunlight streaks down from above, bathing me in its brightness. The sky is a gorgeous deep blue, and goes on forever, unbroken by even the smallest cloud.

Petricia is there with me and we are running through the fields together, laughing and smiling. She is slightly ahead of me and I am trying to catch her. She giggles and runs ahead, teasing me to follow.

“Temyen,” she says.

“Yes,” I reply and run faster trying to catch her.

She remains just out of reach.

“Temyen,” she cries louder.

“Yes, my dear”

She stops running and begins to dance around me, circling happily.

She can’t seem to hear me.

“TEMYEN!”

My eyes snap open and my body jerks involuntarily, “yes, my love!” I blurt out loudly.

Once again my mind races and my eyes quickly drink in the scene around me.

In an instant I recall everything.

The lecture is over; Brother Meek stands close by, staring down at me silently.

I stare back at him in utter exasperation, unsure of what to say or do.

“Temyen,” he says gently, “are you all right?”

I stare at him, unable to speak.

He smiles softly, “Lately, you seem………a little…………distracted.”

“I……I…….”

He holds up his hands and shakes his head, “Go home……...and get some rest.”

He turns and starts walking away and then stops, turning back, “and next time you come to class, see if you can manage to stay awake.”

“Yes, brother,” I reply quickly as he walks away.

 “Just a little distracted,” I think with a small smile as my mind quickly begins to wander again to a particularly lovely, young blonde elf woman who has been filling all of my thoughts lately.